GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize