And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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