You're my little dorito
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
