the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
