Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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