You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize