Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
