the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize