If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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