I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
