I'm laying in your front yard are you home
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
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I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
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We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
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