I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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