ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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