ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
