Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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