im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
