Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
