What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
