i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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