Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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