girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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