Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
