so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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