Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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