I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
When did we convert life to cartoon?
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
