Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
