Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize