Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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