Slut skills are useful in every country.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
