I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
porn star boner night. come get it.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
