Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
i think i just lost a toe
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
