My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
