it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize