zippers are such a cool invention
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
