I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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