fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
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