There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
then he tried to convert me to islam
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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