I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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