with your own penis?
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
