OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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