Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize