where am i from again
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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