we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
