i would punch a child for taco bell
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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