with your own penis?
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
