So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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