Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize
