This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Randomize
