There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
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