Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Randomize