One girl and one boy is just not enough.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Randomize
