let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
